What are the negative effects of perfectionism pushed too far?

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To understand the answer to this question it is important to know that there are different types of perfectionism. Can someone have more than one type? Unfortunately, yes. And as with most cases since it has links to personality and some mental health issues, it may be difficult to change these types of behaviours. It is definitely important to try, if any of the following issues or problems are negatively impacting your life or the life of those you love.

Types of perfectionism

In all cases, people that have this trait are imposing a desire to be perfect, but the direction and source are what differs between the types.

“Self” perfectionism: Those that have this type of perfectionism have a very specific idea of what is perfect and they impose it on themselves even though in most cases the dream or goal is unreachable, unattainable or even dangerous in some cases. They have a highly developed inner critic that constantly judges them and finds them lacking in the search for that goal.

“Other” perfectionism: The people with this type of perfectionism have a specific idea of what perfect looks like and try to impose it on everyone around them. They are highly critical of others and can get extremely angry at others for their perceived failures.

“Social” or “Cultural” perfectionism: This type of perfectionism is present in certain cultures, for certain social ideals, and for unrealistic expectations and are perceived as coming from others. Beauty ideals, social behaviours and performance expectations (academic or work) are often examples of this type of perfectionism.

Problems linked to perfectionism (or the dangers of perfectionism)

Depending on whether the source of the perfectionism is directed internally (towards the self), externally (towards others) or  feels imposed (imposed socially or culturally) it can cause different issues.

Psychological problems:

  • Eating disorders (anorexia, binge eating and bulimic disorders) brought out by trying to reach a perfect image or appearance or unrealistic ideal of beauty.
  • Mental health disorders like anxiety, depression and suicidal thoughts or attempts. Very likely due to the self-criticism and fear of judgement that is involved with this behaviour and that can lead to feelings of shame, sadness, and hopelessness.
  • Interestingly, some research found a link between certain disorders. In one study, researchers showed that those with social anxiety were more likely to exhibit perfectionist traits but not the other way around. Also, there seems to be a link between perfectionism and obsessive-compulsive disorders but that is not always there.

Physical health issues:

  • Chronic stress is more likely to become a factor and that can have an incidence on cardiac health, chronic headaches, digestive issues, sleep problems and even linked to earlier death.

Relationship issues:

  • Low self-compassion towards yourself can mean issues with self-esteem and can have seemingly more awkward interactions with others and can lead to social isolation, loneliness and social hopelessness.
  • Low compassion towards others in the face of what people with perfectionism consider mistakes can make for a highly critical person and can lead to relationship issues such as social isolation, dissatisfaction, difficulties with intimacy, and excessive anger problems.

Treatment problems:

  • Treatment often involves sharing with others and being honest about times and places you were not at your best or talking about emotions that people with perfectionism find “imperfect” and as they excel at avoiding situations or behaviours that make them seem less than perfect in most cases, they can tend to avoid treatment as well. They can also have unrealistic expectations about the time it will take for treatments to get effects.
  • The fact that they need treatment in the first place may make them seem like a “failure” and will make a perfectionist not seek help even though it is greatly negatively impacting their health and social life. Even talking about their perfectionism, which they can see as a strength, unlike depression and anxiety which usually are associated with weakness makes this an even harder problem to approach.

Achievement problems:

There seems to be a rise in the number of perfectionist people. And in a market driven society that are praised by what you do, it is no wonder more and more people are developing the need to be perfect in their performance. They then develop perfectionism that links their personal self-worth with what they can accomplish. Unfortunately, that leads to a host of problems on its own:

  • Workaholism
  • Burnout
  • Fear of failure and success
  • Fear of judgment and rejection
  • Procrastination
  • Self-handicapping (finding excuses instead of preparing) and Self-sabotaging (thinking you will fail so much that you don’t do what you need to do to succeed and then having the critical self voice that says “See, you failed; you can’t succeed” And reinforcing that belief for next time.

Is there good perfectionism?

This is where I mostly reach the problem with this research topic. Some are saying there is good perfectionism (calling it “adaptive”) and bad perfectionism (or “maladaptive”), others say that it should be separated between conscientiousness (or excellence or high achievement) and perfectionism, where the first set is good and the other always has issues. Another source is saying that whatever label you put on it, perfectionism always has issues associated with it like anxiety and depression and because of the heavy impact on health and social interactions it should be treated the same, but this is harder to do because as mentioned before unlike anxiety and depression it can feel beneficial. Perfectionists seem to be at higher risk of developing any and all of these issues.

It seems to be all in how this behaviour traits interact with others people may have like neuroticism and the type of environment they grow in, their resilience to stress, and their levels of self-compassion. What social and cultural pressures are around and how susceptible people are to them can also influence the outcome.

I believe labeling it as good or bad is not as useful as finding ways to manage the “negative” and harness the “positive” in a way that is beneficial to all. Next week, I will be looking into how you know you are perfectionist to see if your health issues are linked to this or perhaps to something else. I think delving into this topic a bit deeper than I usually do can be very beneficial to those of us with perfectionism issues and given that my anxiety is performance based in some respects, I believe it is also linked to perfectionism so this research will help me as well.

Thank you for reading!

“At its root, perfectionism isn’t really about a deep love of being meticulous. It’s about fear. Fear of making a mistake. Fear of disappointing others. Fear of failure. Fear of success.”

– Michael Law

Resources

“Psychology Works” Fact Sheet: Perfectionism

https://www.choosingtherapy.com/perfectionism/

https://www.bbc.com/future/article/20180219-toxic-perfectionism-is-on-the-rise

Posted in Creative's tool-box, Mental Health, Perfectionism and tagged , , , , , , .

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